Sunday, February 20, 2011

Life and Love: Three Levels of Presence

Life and Love: Three Levels of Presence: "This is somehow a sequel to my Valentine's 2010 article. There, I talk about the top three inexpensive ways to make your woman f..."

Three Levels of Presence

This is somehow a sequel to my Valentine's  2010 article. There, I talk about the top three  inexpensive ways to make your woman feel special on valentine's day. All those three boils down to being PRESENT to your loved one for you to express your love.

This article now will talk about the levels of presence that we experience in our lives. Presence which keeps the bond together.

Physical presence is the most basic. What brought us to each other's arms started commonly  from physical attraction, hence physical presence. From there we nurture our feelings every step of the way. We express our love through touch, hugs and kisses. We feel secured knowing that somebody is just right beside us or right behind us ready to catch us or pick us up when we fall. We need this kind of presence for the mere fact that no one can live alone. It is in the physical presence that we can carry out what we want to  and it is in the physical presence that we can feel and experience the things which our thoughts would like to express.

Emotional presence is equally important. Here, you may not be physically present but your thought and being are well conveyed to the other person for the latter to feel the surreal you. This kind of presence patches up the gaps when physical presence is impossible. It is through this kind of presence that one is assured, even wihtout seeing the person, that he/she is just around. It creates a higher level of emotional secuirty knowing that someone cares and is thinking of us though not present pyscially. The surreality of such creates a much stronger bond as it can withstand the trials. It is grounded on two very strong foundations - LOVE and TRUST. Either of the two absent can make this level of presence fledgling.

The third and the highest kind of presence is spiritual presence. Seldom that man can achieve this. We can just easily say "I'm with you in spirit...", but whether is is true or not, it would be up to the one saying it. Only one can truly give justice to this kind of presence - our Omnipotent God. Seeing all of us every millisecond of the day, He can touch us with His all-encompassing love. No ordinary man can ever do such.

Of these three levels of presence, the first two belongs and is workable by humans like us. Neither of which is far important than the other. It should work together. If physical presence cannot be carried out, by all means, emotional presence can be resorted to, to fill the gap. Doing such, a long and lasting bond is surely achieved.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Life and Love: Valentine's 2010

Life and Love: Valentine's 2010: "This article speaks about the different points of view between husbands and wives on the occasion of valentine's day. However, as the author..."

Valentine's 2010

This article speaks about the different points of view between husbands and wives on the occasion of valentine's day. However, as the author and being a woman, this article may tilt more on the woman's point of view. You may all agree or disagree. It's a matter of opinion and experience.

On this day, they call the day of the hearts, many women including the author, would like to believe that it is the day when she feels more special. It is also the day when she may confirm that she is still loved and cared for. It's a day of reassurance, especially for married women.

One woman I know listed all the things that her man can do, inexpensively, to make her feel more special and well loved on this day of hearts.

First on the list is an inexpensive NOTE. A simple note, written by her man and posted on the fridge door or anywhere else around the house would surely bring a smile on her face. Even if the note is just written on a simple post-it paper, it will be cherished for sure. Mind you guys, women would surely keep in a safe and secret place.

Second, a simple WALK BY THE BEACH watching either the sunrise or the sunset is such a romantic treat. It will be treasured in her heart until she gets old and could no longer remember anything.  For sure that feeling would remain in her heart.

Third, a GOOD TALK with her man would matter a lot. Keeping the communication lines open is a big deal for women. It would be a treasured moment to remember a day that both of you had a good laugh, a good talk or even if both of you cried for certain reasons other than marital/partner problems. Such us when both of you watch a good movie which might touch your hearts and bring you both to tears. Such moment will be remembered.

These are the top three inexpensive ways to express and reaffirm your love to your partner. Again this is on the point of view of a woman.

Now we go to the men's point of view. I've known of a man who have never done any surprises to her girls before. However lately, he learned the art of surprising his woman. Men at times work and plan at their own pace. They at times would not care of the time or good timing.  As soon as they can get their plans done, then that's it.

Men I think, due to their chivalry within, would impressed their women with precious gifts. Of course, women would appreciate it. They want to give  jewelry, expensive gifts, bring their women to good restaurants and all that. Again, all these are surely appreciated by women. But just a piece of advice, when all these expensive ways of expressing one's love cannot be carried out at times, go back to the basics, the top three ways listed above. You'll surely be safe.

On a personal note, this year's valentine's is quite extraordinary. There were hitches somewhere but love found its own way of expressing itself. The three red roses and a big heart-shaped balloon given beyond the hours of valentine's day were yet sweet and reassuring. Thank you for the effort and the thought that went with it. I love you.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Life and Love: Mediation: Its Ups and Downs

Life and Love: Mediation: Its Ups and Downs: "A couple of years ago, I had the opportunity to apply and be accepted as one of Zamboanga City's accredited mediators of the Supreme Court o..."

Life and Love: 14th Wedding Anniversary

Life and Love: 14th Wedding Anniversary: "As I write this article, it is yet half of the day of our 14th wedding anniversary. I rushed to write down the things that transpired to sav..."

14th Wedding Anniversary

As I write this article, it is yet half of the day of our 14th wedding anniversary. I rushed to write down the things that transpired to savor the moment.

Few days before our anniversary, I was already contemplating on what gift to give my hubby. I thought of coming up with a personally-made anniversary card so I can express everything I want. I won't be constrained with the space provided for by commercial cards. Of course, if there is a card, there must be an envelop for it. These I decided to make on my own.

So the day before our anniversary, I got busy doing my stuff. This is one of my favorite pass time - art works. First, I managed to write down the contents of my card. I wish to share it here, but NO, it has to be read only by the person to whom it is addressed - my husband. Then I came to the cover part. I bought several butterfly stickers and letter stickers, all too colorful to go with the occasion. I felt, as I was dong it, that I was yet on my teenage years, but mature enough to dig out my inner feelings and put it into writing. I made use of some stocked specialty paper and a photograph of us way back 14 years ago, and anniversary card is done.

Now, it has to come with an envelop of its size. I manage to cut out two bond papers, cut it to the design I  deemed fitting for my card. As I sealed my card inside the envelop, I thought of buying a little something that will go with. I headed to the nearest mall. Luckily, I think that red polo shirt was really meant for him, as it was hanged far back but yet I noticed it and really did met my taste. In thirty minutes, I was back in the office, putting my stuff inside a ready made paper bag.

Heading home, I was excited to surprise my husband when he goes home from work at 1 a.m.. But to my surprise, he was already at home, doing the dinner. It was his day off. Nevertheless, without doing anymore the planned surprises, I followed him as he entered the room and gave my gift to him. I was happy looking at him donning the red polo shirt in front of the full length mirror. I had a smile on my face as it fitted to a tee to him. At this time, it was yet 8 o'clock or four hours before our wedding anniversary. But I felt satisfied as I have done my plans.

The next day, our anniversary day, I treated it as an ordinary day. Not expecting for anything. By 11:00 a.m., I got a text message from my hubby telling me that he is up for a lunch date for us. It was sumptuous. He had it in one of the key restaurants in the city, where the best lechon kawali is served. It's his and mines favorite, with knicker bucker to finish it up to a bloat....haha. On the seat was a present for me. An office suit placed inside a red-colored bag. Beautiful... and I saw a hint of the price....hahaha...he didn't notice it....

After which, we went back to office to finish some pending office works. It was a simple celebration though, almost common, but it hit me. The effort is still there. The fire is still there. The love is still there.

At 14 years as a couple, we don't feel it that way. We don't feel that it was already 14 years ago. For me, it seemed like just yesterday when we had our son. But his already 13 years old. It's just a matter of keeping the love alive. Happy Anniversary Pang!

Marriage is indeed a matter of holding on and nurturing that old feeling which brought you to the promise of togetherness - I do, I will, Together, Forever.....